In the first few days after Zane was killed, a friend dropped off a book for me to read, “Nightfall to Daybreak”. She said she knew the family and they too had lost a son. When I was ready, I should read the book. It was written by the mother, Sally Walls, who tells the story of how she was thrown into the grief community. I first opened it a few months after and quickly closed it and placed it in a box. It was unreadable. It was far too painful.
I found it when we moved to the condo and opened it up again. The crisp white pages and the large, typed font made it an easy read. The content was not as easy. Sally Walls writes about the love and loss of her 18-year-old son Davis. She writes of the anticipation of his birth and the joy of being his mother, watching him grow into a respectful young man and watching him graduate. She writes about the week after his graduation, when the police came to her door to let her know he was killed in a bicycle-vehicle fatality. She shares the anguish and despair of her journey with quotes, biblical verses, facts and beautiful comparisons of her grief to her reality.
Sally’s friend sent her a collection of beach glass. She writes, “Each broken piece has been smoothed over time by the journey it’s been on. I scoop them all into my hands and close my eyes. I run my fingers over them. I don’t hurry. There are no sharp edges. I sense that I will be able to handle the brokenness, given time. I will be able to pick up the pieces. We will put life back together again, like a mosaic.”
She writes of driving home with Davis as a small baby and avoiding a near fatal crash that sent her a clear message then. “You and your baby were spared tonight.” She tells the story of Davis sharing with her a beloved character, Leonidas, a leader possessing extreme courage in the face of death and wondering why he would share this just weeks before his death. Were these premonitions?
This book is not for the newly grieving. It is raw and real and hits your heart hard. Sally is one of us. Many of her thoughts and actions echo mine. By the end of the book, I felt a comradery with this woman I knew of but had never met. Inside the cover of my copy, my friend had her sign. Sally writes, “We are holding our hands around your brokenness.”
We are told that sharing our story, when we are able, is a responsibility. Share your story and you might help someone find their own. “Nightfall to Daybreak” is filled with supportive messages that one or more of them you can hold unto. Thank you, Sally.
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